Imposters

You have reached the website of Muramasa Industries, corporate facade of the author Jonathan Clements. Not Jon, John, Johnathan, or Jonathon. Not Clemments, Clemence, Clemons or Clemens. These permutations are listed here in order to defeat the vagaries of search engines. It surprises me the number of times it is spelled incorrectly, as there are a bunch of other JCs out there on the net who spell their name in exactly the same way as me. At least two of them are also authors, which makes typing my name into Amazon a bizarre experience.

One of my evil twins writes for the Wall Street Journal about matters financial, and has published numerous books on the subject. He is not me. I don't know anything about money, except I would always like to have more of it.

Another writes joke books and, it would seem, "comedic erotica." I know this because about once a year some wag will buy me a copy of Keep it Kinky or Dearest Mummy I've Been Ravaged, and say they never knew about my "other" writing career. Those books were published before I was born, and yet I can't seem to escape them. With an impending sense of bitter irony, I suspect that particular Jonathan Clements is actually a pseudonym. What are the odds?

There are other Jonathan Clements's out there, including a surfer in France, who may also be a translator in Paris, and a financial adviser in England. I've never met any of them, but one day, when I am rich and famous, I shall sign them all up with Muramasa Industries and we shall form a world-beating publishing power-house. That also surfs, and advises financially, and tells jokes.